Hey.....Persnicketers!
I had a jazzy jeff weekend. three of four ain't bad, i think that's what meatloaf said one once. spent some time with some people who know me now and some time with some people who never knew me and some time with some people who really just don't have any idea but it's okay.
two and half days of constant thumparific madness, functioned to a sufficient level. swung a big stick, swung a big ball, with tender fingers i tap keys.
swapped many colors into the wee wee hours to pass the non-sleeping hours away. household items have been washed in preparation of making them soon unwashed again. the work week is near, i look forward to it unmuch.
funny combinations of left and right, steady consistent right, one twenty beats per second, left intermitent, sporadic.
sync-O-pated.
you think i'm a coin, but i am a dodecahedron.
it's risky. it's risky. you say it's risky. i am not a risk. i am not a risk. i am a risk worth taking.
when evening falls...so hard...i will comfort you.
i'll take your part.
when darkness comes
and pain is all around
like a bridge
over
troubled water
i will lay me down
sail on.
sail on by.
your time has come
to shine
all your dreams are on their way
see how they shine!
oh, if you need a friend
i'm sailing right behind
a man like me is dead in places
other men feel liberated
and I can't love
shot full of holes
don't feel nothing
i just feel cold
don't feel nothing
just old scars
toughenin' up around my heart
but i want love
just a different kind
i want love
won't break down
won't brick me up
won't fence me in
i want a love
that don't mean a thing
that's the love i want
i want love
on my own terms
after everything that i've ever learned
me, i carry too much baggage
oh man i've seen so much traffic
but i want love
just a different kind
so bring it on
i've been bruised
don't give me love
that's clean and smooth
i'm ready for the rougher stuff
no sweet romance
i've had enough
i wanted so much more.
I can't think. Can't form two consecutive coherent ideas, and if I could I doubt I would be able to communicate them to you.
i need to write here. need to update. need to post. need to stop being lazy. but i'm so tired, so very tired.
when i wake up in the morning, it will be a whole new day in every way.
Again.
on my loom i weave the cloth that keeps me warm and comfortable.
loom.
nothing is looming.
it's 3am. i miss you.
You.
I'm thinking about you.
i've got clicks and pics, i've got five faces on a slideshow behind my eyes, i give thanks for this...inspiration.
goddamn the beat never stops, i've been comin' to where i am from the get go, it's never quitting time.
i'm snappin', i'm cracklin', i'm about to pop. calm still, eager to arise. what shall the morning bring?
percolation sensations.
i've been in the desert a long time now. with just enough drops to keep me going. nothing within a hundred miles.
i think i might just lay here for a minute. i just need to rest for a minute. i'll be okay. i'll be along.
i don't have the words or the energy. i don't have the answer.
tired and confused. disappointed.
if not here - then where?
if not you - then who?
if not now - then when?
i have moments of freaked-outedness that consume me from the inside out, asphyxiating. moments that cause me to tremble and tear up, earthquakes in my brain.
but they are only moments, just hold on and the moments pass. the moments pass. and when the moments pass i go on.
you have seen them. i have showed them to you. i think you would care if you could, but you cannot. i know.
maybe once, maybe twice.
