Two

He geared down to second, let it wind down, and coasted up to the intersection. The first was too easy. No conflict. This one had roots that twined. This one had seemed more real. He could chuckle about that concept now. More real.

On down the road. He knew her, it still had taken time to figure out what should be done. The goal was to capture closure tonight, to force a crossroads. This would be difficult. In some ways, he wasn’t ready for this, but it had to happen.
The door opened and her arms were around him. He grabbed her up and spun her around.

“Why didn’t you call? I didn’t know you were coming over tonight!”

"I wasn’t so sure, either. I just needed to see you. You have anything going on, is it okay?”

“Yeah, come on in. Anything wrong?”

“Nah, not really.”

They moved inside. Gandy sat on the couch, she went into the kitchen.

“Something to drink?”

“Got any tea?”

“Nope. Got some Mountain Dew, though...@

“That’s cool.”

“Saw some of the gang last night. Me and Jenny went to GT’s and met some of the guys.”

“Did ya? Have fun?

"I got seriously fucked up! I told'em not to let me start on those gin and tonics, I told Jenny, "Whatever you do, do not let me get a gin and tonic." So, of course, you know what the first thing she said to the guys was! As soon as T heard that he was all over me. You know, “Come on, come on, you know you want one...”

“He was right, you know. Thanks for the drink.”

“No problem. What do you mean he was right?”

“You wanted to get fucked up. Telling Jenny to stop you was just a game you were playing for attention.”

“You know me too well, Gandy.”

"I do. How could I not? How many years has it been now?”

"I moved here sophomore year...has it been that long?”

“Yep. I can still remember the very first time I saw you. Do you remember it? I was at my locker - it was a bottom locker so I was down on my knees-I had my books and started to stand up and next thing I knew I was seeing stars!”

“You know I didn’t mean to! I didn’t know you were going to stand up so suddenly!”

"I fell over and cracked my head on the floor and my books went everywhere! Damn, that hurt..."

“I'm sorry! You still haven’t forgiven me for that!”

“Yes I have. In fact, I forgave you right after it happened. You bent down and put one hand on my chest and the other on my head and asked me if I was okay. I opened my eyes and you were all blurry, but man, when I got my focus back I just stared up at you. I looked into those eyes of yours and my life was never the same.”

“Yeah, that’s the day it all started to go downhill!”

“Are you crazy? It’s the day my life really began.”

He took a drink and sat it back down on the coaster. Water beads ran down the sides.

“Is something going on with you, Gandy? Last night, the guys told me I'm not the only one who hadn’t seen you in a while. They seemed worried about you, said you hadn’t been yourself lately.”

“Yes I have, I’ve been completely myself, for the first time in a very long time. Funny thing is, the more I'm me, the less I need them. More and more, though, I realize I do need you.”

“You know I'm here for you anytime you need me, anytime you want me. We’ve got such a history! I couldn’t ever turn my back on you, whatever you’re going through it doesn't have to be alone. You’re the best friend I ever had.”

"I hope you know what you’re saying. I hope you know exactly what that means.”

“Well, I think I do!”

“I'm afraid you really don’t...I=m afraid..."

Another sip. He leaned forward and sighed.
“We do have a history, don’t we? I have a million memories of us, and they all make me so happy. All that we’ve been through. I can’t imagine having to live life without you, Danielle. I’ve told you this before, but this time I want you to hear me. You may not be ready to hear me, but you’ve got to hear it. I love you. You’re not just my friend, you’re my everything. You make it all ok. I love you. For years, I’ve sat up at night and dreamed of your face, heard your
laugh in my head, heard you calling my name. I can’t hold it in any more, it’s too big. You’re with me every second of every day, and I can’t keep it from you any more. You have to know, for better or worse.”

Silence.

It went on and on. And on. It got bigger and thicker and sucked all the air out of the room.

And then finally she spoke, softly and slowly.

“This has been a long time coming. Ever since that first day when I cracked your head on my locker door, when I touched you, when you looked up at me...we both felt it. All the days and nights we’ve spent together, the trips we’ve taken, the endless hours on the phone, the things I could only tell you. I’ve always felt safe with you. We love the same things, react the same way, and I believe we’re headed down the same path. I’ve known you were the one...and I knew
we’d end up in this place one day.”

She stopped. Minutes passed before she started again.

“Only, I'm not ready for this day to come just yet. I have so much more learning to do, so much more finding out about myself to do. If I gave myself to you, there would be no turning back. I’d give all of me and not be able to really finish the growing up I have to do. I have to experience the world on my own before I, before we...I'm sorry, Gandy.”

And then he said, “Don’t be sorry, I understand. But I wouldn’t have told you unless I was ready. Since you’re not, it does make things a little awkward. I'm not sure how we go on, or where we go from here, but the important part, the amazing part, is that you love me, Dani.”

“And that you love me, even after this...I don’t know whether to be happy or to be sad. I don’t think we can go on like nothing has happened, we can’t pretend we don’t have these feelings. If I'm around you, I won’t be able to stop myself, and I don’t think you would either. How can we go out or spend time on the phone and act like we’re just friends? How can I go on living my life and act like I=m not in love with someone?”

“You can’t. And I'm not going to ask you to. I'm going to stand up now, and I'm going to walk out that door. When you’re ready, you know where to find me, ok.”

"OK. I know you’re right, but isn’t there any other way?”

“It’s the only way. It’s the only way I can show you how much I love you right now. By walking away.”

He bent down and ran his fingers through her hair and kissed her on the forehead. “Don’t forget me...”

“Never.”

He walked out the door and to his car. She pulled the curtain back just a little and watched him go. She was crying tears of infinite pain. He opened the car door and got in. As he drove away, he thought, “Done.”